Author of 'Do I have to be good all the time?' wondering about life, love and awkward moments. A lot of of awkward moments, actually. And sometimes chocolate. You have been warned…

Tag Archives: women

Somehow it’s August. Though I haven’t written anything just for here in quite a while (er, did someone say January…?) I have been busying around elsewhere. Here’s a few of the things I’ve been doing…

The GalleryI made a radio programme! The Gallery is a show exploring culture and the arts through the lens of faith. It’s half an hour of performances and interviews with talented, interesting people talking about their work including painter Charlie Mackesy, comedian Jo Enright, award-winning poet Michael Symmons Roberts and TED talk slam poet Harry Baker. Have a listen, tell me what you think and if you like it, tell your friends (#TheGallery). There are extended interviews online too so you never have to be starved of insight and loveliness ever again. Listen here. 

LinahI’ve been writing too, mostly about culture, society, and women. It’s been two years since my friend Linah was killed by her ex-partner. I wrote about her life and death after the murder trial was finally over last year in The Independent (piece here) and to remember her again I wrote a piece this week for Cosmopolitan after an incident that reminded me how domestic violence is an on-going issue nobody should look away from. “If the pattern of the last decade continues, there will be another Linah every 3.5 days. Another woman killed by male violence. Another name kept alive through words only. Another headline fading into a statistic. Another funeral, inquest, and trial. It appears I can not walk by anymore, literally or figuratively. Though it’s painful for Linah’s death to overshadow her life, reminding the world she existed may help to change the outcomes of other women.” Read the full piece here.

Going back into my past life, when I used to travel the world visiting factories, I interviewed stylists, experts on ethical sourcing & buyers to find out if things have changed and how we can buy better: “Before that final transaction in a busy high street store, costs were incurred right across the world and the greatest costs landed with the people with the least power and fewest options. Our low price is someone else’s compromised life. We have privilege, we have choice and we’ve started to feel entitled, leaving the ethics to someone else despite evidence of exploitation.”   Click here to read  We all deserve a better high street.

Vision expressI wrote about how images of war are used to sell products. This is Who is that boy? Faraway wars and western media: “A bedraggled, bewildered, toddler clutching a grubby teddy bear, alone in the rubble of an unnamed land. Not the latest news from Syria, Iraq, or Ukraine, but the debut of a new advert for an optician.” Read more here.

sandra-blandI write a lot about how women are represented in media, including this review of recent news: It’s been terrible week for women and yes, it matters. Covering an array of stories from the changing of the Tesco self-checkout voice to the deaths of black women in police custody, “Every time women are quietened or silenced, reduced to a transaction, commodity or prize, it reduces our value in the eyes of the world. To be considered more “interesting” dead than alive is not surprising in a media age that bombards us with images of glamourised violence and decorative sexuality.”  Here’s the article.

In NSFW: Not Suitable For What…? I wrote about images of women’s bodies available online, ranging from pornography to beauty advertising. “From their early years, women hear how their bodies are useful, or not, to men. They will be told they are the cause of anger, frustration, lust, danger, and confusion… In church women’s pesky bodies have been stumbling blocks, Delilah-esque destroyers, Biblical seducers, property of husbands, that could be tested and cursed according to his whims, and an undermining presence for men’s spirituality and even identity, feminising men away from the church with our jiggly bits, and even from belief in God. Who knew hips really could lie?Carry on reading here.

Elderly-couple-walking-near-beach-editedI’ve written a few words on love and relationships too. I always start by wondering, and here are a few places those wonderings ended up. I was wondering… if you’re attached explored how our early years experiences can affect the way we approach relationships as a grown up. I was wondering… why you’re hiding looks at the pointless pursuit of perfection and increasing pressure to hide our flaws and dismiss others for theirs, and I was wondering… how to have a happy marriage about just that. There’s a whole archive of thoughts and advice if you simply must know more.

baby its cold outsideAnd because the world is sometimes an amusing place, here’s a highly seasonal piece I wrote for the people at Funny Women back when we were all shivering under duvets. Have a read of Baby it’s cold outside here. Their revamped site is looking fancy and now links to other things I’ve written for them, about my nieces’ insatiable love of One Direction, and why wildlife seems to find me irresistible in a heatwave.

Premier awardsAnd if you’ve been writing, blogging, tweeting or anything else online this year you might be interested in a rare opportunity to have me judge you. What a treat! Find out more about the Premier Digital Awards here. Entries close on September 4th so still time to nominate your favourite people. Oh, and if you’ve always wanted to hear me explain BDSM to a woman from Canterbury, I’m delighted to oblige. That should keep you busy for a little while…

Advertisements

I don’t speak at Christian events in order to be famous. Promise. In fact they come at a cost. Working in the creative industries, writing words and stories, faith of any sort isn’t a badge of honour. I don’t really fit in the Christian camp either. I’m not the obvious choice to invite to your women’s event and I’m in nobody’s worst, wildest, dream a traditional preacher. Topics I’ve spoken on relate to what I know how to do – writing, creativity, publishing, culture, media and storytelling – and sometimes what’s required to see those things through if that’s where you’re called. The hard work and resilience needed, the importance of identity, discipline and persistence in the face of tough and unforgiving industries, how to make good choices and balance huge success (should it come) and abject failure (which definitely will) through a lens of faith. A man could speak on those topics too; if I’m asked it’s because on that occasion my version of events, observations and experience is the one that fits the bill. Continue reading


Being a proper woman is my life goal and thus I turn – as do many females working from home, taking care of children or not otherwise engaged – to ITV’s This Morning where lessons in excelling in femininity flow daily. Award winning and with an audience of millions (them not me), I’m in good hands.

I can expect my outfits to be analysed and graded by an all-knowing panel of reality stars and a jaunty Irish man, expert in culotte length and the ways of the box pleat. I am told nude heels will add a classy touch to any outfit (assuming I’m nothing other than pale and white, obvs) though also that heels are out and sandals are in – a paradox I can digest more easily while utilising the information that white chocolate goes well with sparkling wine. I have learned Continue reading